Journey to Standing Rock

1.
You long to know what you will do
With the rest of your life
with the finite time left.
You want to be brutally honest
And brave.
You also know you have but one death
And choosing your fate has appeal.
2.
The journey begins with a vision of deeper discoveries
Of walking in beauty,
Which may be done
 pretty much anywhere. 
Although it is important to remember
that walking in beauty 
is different than talking
of walking in beauty.
3.
All journeys begin
with an intention
Some also with a fatal execution
your partner leaving, 
you leaving,
ending, separating,
each declaring the joint venture over
she needing to be by herself
the woman who chose work over time with you
a perfectly rational choice
except for a person who says
Love is the most important thing
That you are her true love
And deeply matter.
But oaths lose
And pledges lose
And you are a different you than the one she wanted
Though she will care for your dog while you’re away
As your dog will care for her
Each on their own spiritual journey.
Maybe it will be her dog.
4.
Near the beginning of the voyage
A woman appears
Out of thin air
Divine and ethereal
A woman slumbering
Like Briar Rose
Under the same spell for decades
The same weight
The same burdens 
Now awakened
A sleeping beauty
Stretching
Reaching out
unencumbered by earthly constraints
Sans job, home, or husband
With but one son, one dog, two grandchildren, and three cats
One of whom is dying
She well knows the special role she plays in their lives
And leaves them
all of them
for you.
Do not ask how her son sees all that.
At least the kids still talk with her.
5.
You and she fill her van to the gunnels with supplies
To bring to the Standing Rock Sioux,
To the Water Protectors in North Dakota
Cannonball North Dakota: One rundown store and a gas pump
Blankets, winter clothing, propane, wood, a wood splitting maul,
an axe, sleeping bags, tents, a stove, a tarp,
bolt cutters, hand and foot warmers, earplugs.
There is not enough room left under the van’s roof
to slide in one thin sheet of paper.
6.
They are housed and hosted
Succored on their journey across the continent.
Across mountains and sacred rivers
by friends who are happy to serve
new and old friends
friends who live in castles above olden rivers
people who live in apple orchards, in cities,
with children here and children on the way,
with shared custody arrangements
in rooms belonging to eight year old and ten year old boys
rooms filed with team jerseys, photographs, hats, trophies,
gloves for four different sports.
7.
In Minneapolis he goes into some form of skin shedding
Says he is transitioning.
Vaporous.
Dizzy.
Nauseous.
As if overcome
Does not eat.
People think he looks sickly
They feel concern for
the farting old man
who says he has six years to live.
Who says he is not going into any nursing home
Who says he is not hanging around
If he can’t toilet himself.
8.
They convince him they are frightened for him
They convince him to be seen in Urgent Care
To have x-rays, ultrasounds, and blood tests
The doctors and labs find nothing wrong w him,
Other than a depression at the lower end of his left lung,
something he’s not sure he needed to know.
He tells the doctor he is shedding his skin.
At least one of them believes him.
9.
They visit the Sioux at Pine Ridge and Standing Rock
Sioux fighting for 500 years to remain Sioux
Still fighting
Proud, determined
Reverent, persistent
Worshippers of ancestors
Of Mother Earth
Her soil, plants,
her air and waters
Of the four leggeds
and the beings that fly.
They are sure we are all related
That people are Earth protectors
The Earth our garden and well.
10.
There is Oregon
All of California
Encampment at Oak Flat
The police in Oklahoma
Lobbying Congress
The humorous truth
That they travel together
For 18 thousand miles
For 18 weeks
And break up 18 times.
And then no more.