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Homage to an Unattractive Woman

The most unattractive woman I ever made love with –
I know you think that unkind –
had a seizure disorder and took dilantin,
but had a wonderful mind.
Her teeth were rotted,
she was short and quite plump,
had stubbly hairs on her face,
wore glasses, even in bed …
and bloomers.
 
Her hair was a mess,
her knees were knobby,
when she opened her mouth
saliva stuck to her upper and lower palate.

She was an English teacher
in love with poetry,
romanticism,
Bharati Mukherjee
and Alan Ginsburg
 
She even looked like Alan Ginsburg,
laughed like him,
turned in onto herself,
aware of who she was,
and how she appeared,
and the fact that she had you in bed
and was going to enjoy it.
 
She had slept with my best friend Henry,
who I also adored.
She even loved him,
as did I.
He was so handsome
so beat,
and just the right mixture of
longshoreman and literary intellectual.
I was clearly her second choice,
as well it should be.
 
Her mind was brilliant
Her hands were a mess
Her clothes were a mess
She was brutally honest
Lovely in her way
Especially naked.
 
Her courage was more daunting than Henry’s
who is still in hiding,
her thighs softer,
she made nicer noises,
and never belched
or maybe she did.
 
I don’t remember everyone I ever slept with,
but here’s to a beautiful woman I do remember,
her name, in truth, was Linda.

POETRY

    Bharati Mukherjee

    Crow Blacker Than Ever – Ted Hughes 

    When God, disgusted with man, 
    Turned towards heaven. 
    And man, disgusted with God, 
    Turned towards Eve, 
    Things looked like falling apart. 
    But Crow . . Crow 
    Crow nailed them together, 
    Nailing Heaven and earth together –
    So man cried, but with God’s voice. 
    And God bled, but with man’s blood. 
    Then heaven and earth creaked at the joint 
    Which became gangrenous and stank – 
    A horror beyond redemption. 
    The agony did not diminish. 
    Man could not be man nor God God. 
    The agony 
    Grew. 
    Crow 
    Grinned 
    Crying: ‘This is my Creation,’ 
    Flying the black flag of himself.


    (This poem may seem odd to some. It is one of a few dozen
    crow poems in Hughes’ entire book of crow poems, Crow.
    Hughes had a very dark side. Just ask Sylvia Plath.)

     

    Poetry

      The Shyness – Sharon Olds

      Then, when we were joined, I became
      completed, joyful, shyer. 
      I may have shone more, reflected
      more, and from deep inside there rose
      some glow passing steadily through me, but I was not
      small, in a raftered church, or in
      playing, now, I felt like someone
      a cathedral, the vaulted spaces of the body
      like a sacred woods.  I was quiet when my throat was not
      making those iron, orbital, earth,
      rusted, noises at the hinge of matter and
      whatever is not matter.  He takes me
      into the endings like another world at the
      center of this one, and then, if he begins to
      end when I am resting and I do not rejoin him yet
      then I feel awe, I almost feel
      fear, sometimes for a moment I feel
      I should not move, or make a sound, as
      if he is alone, now,
      howling in the wilderness,
      and yet I know we are in this place
      together.  I thought, now is the moment
      I could become more loving, and my hands moved shyly
      over him, secret as heaven
      and my mouth spoke, and in my beloved’s
      voice, by the bones of my head, the fields
      groaned, and then I joined him again,
      not shy, not bold, released, entering
      the true home, where the trees bend down along the
      ground and yet stand, then we lay together
      panting as if saved from some disaster, and for ceaseless
      instants, it came to pass what I have
      heard about, it came to me
      that I did not know I was separate
      from this man, I did not know I was lonely.

      Poetry

        A Quiet Life – Baron Wormser

        What a person desires in life
           is a properly boiled egg.
        This isn’t as easy as it seems.
        There must be gas and a stove,
           the gas requires pipelines, mastodon drills,
           banks that dispense the lozenge of capital.
        There must be a pot, the product of mines
           and furnaces and factories,
           of dim early mornings and night-owl shifts,
           of women in kerchiefs and men with
           sweat-soaked hair.
        Then water, the stuff of clouds and skies
           and God knows what causes it to happen.
        There seems always too much or too little
           of it and more pipelines, meters, pumping
           stations, towers, tanks.
        And salt-a miracle of the first order,
           the ace in any argument for God.
            Only God could have imagined from
           nothingness the pang of salt.
        Political peace too. It should be quiet
           when one eats an egg. No political hoodlums
           knocking down doors, no lieutenants who are
           ticked off at their scheming girlfriends and
           take it out on you, no dictators
           posing as tribunes.
        It should be quiet, so quiet you can hear
           the chicken, a creature usually mocked as a type
           of fool, a cluck chained to the chore of her body.
        Listen, she is there, pecking at a bit of grain
           that came from nowhere.

        Poetry

          A Wreath to the Fish – Nancy Willard

          Who is this fish, still wearing its wealth,
          flat on my drainboard, dead asleep,
          its suit of mail proof only against the stream?
          What is it to live in a stream,
          to dwell forever in a tunnel of cold,
          never to leave your shining birthsuit,
          never to spend your inheritance of thin coins?
          And who is the stream, who lolls all day
          in an unmade bed, living on nothing but weather,
          singing, a little mad in the head,
          opening her apron to shells, carcasses, crabs,
          eyeglasses, the lines of fisherman begging for
          news from the interior-oh, who are these lines
          that link a big sky to a small stream
          that go down for great things:
          the cold muscle of the trout,
          the shining scrawl of the eel in a difficult passage,
          hooked-but who is this hook, this cunning
          and faithful fanatic who will not let go
          but holds the false bait and the true worm alike
          and tears the fish, yet gives it up to the basket
          in which it will ride to the kitchen
          of someone important, perhaps the Pope
          who rejoices that his cook has found such a fish
          and blesses it and eats it and rises, saying,
          “Children, what is it to live in the stream,
          day after day, and come at last to the table,
          transfigured with spices and herbs,
          a little martyr, a little miracle;
          children, children, who is this fish?”


          Poetry

            Shivering in Majesty 

            1.
            I have earned and care for a small plot of land
            A small cottage
            A dog
            Sometimes a woman
            My son.

            2.
            My daughter has found a good man
            She has love, wisdom, and a daughter of her own
            If they keep loving one another
            They will be lucky
            That’s what the owl in my yard says

            3.
            In the yard are Tibetan prayer flags.
            Brought and hung by my sister. 
            When the breeze blows in off the bay
            The things I’ve wished for come to me
            The smell of the salted air
            Birds at the bird feeders
            A sense I belong
            That I do not consume more than my share
            Some seaweed, some flax seed
            Though I give back so little –
            Juice for the hummingbirds
            A house for bats
            My flesh to feed the worms and earth
            in a pauper’s grave
            by a sacred lake

            4.
            When the breeze goes out 
            it takes my hopes and wishes with it
            they ride over the Tibetan prayer flags
            and are made holy
            My wish for peace
            for relevance
            for the happiness and well being of others.
            my compassion washes over the banners
            carrying words I do not understand

            5.
            These words reach the bay
            where small fishes
            are being chased by bigger fishes
            chased by men 
            in boats with two hundred horse power engines
            towed to the beach in three hundred horse power cars
            to catch one poor fish
            to remind them of the hunt
            the cycle
            the natural order 
            of the big eating the small
            forgetting the grace of small nets

            6.
            And beyond the bay 
            Are the wars I finance
            Fueled with jealousy, envy, hunger,
            The wish for relevance,
            An inherent primate consciousness,
            And a sense of mission,
            A desire to be of use,
            to turn oxygen into carbon dioxide
            so that plants too may live 
            shivering in the majesty 
            of immense rolls of summer thunder
            stretching out to remind us
            of our tasks
            and our roots
            in the heavens.


            © BRTaub – 8/8

            POETRY

              She Has Loved 100 Men

              She asks
              How is it possible
              She has loved one hundred men
              And at their impaired age
              This is the best love making she’s known.
              He says it’s an illusion.


              She asks 
              Can he make her taller
              With blue eyes
              And unwrinkled skin
              And can he really unearth the dead
              But what she is really asking
              Is that he hold her
              And promise to never let go


              She says
              You are so solid
              And means the flesh she draws near
              And the man inside the flesh 
              With his flaws and foibles
              And a willingness to be weak 
              Standing in his power and strength.

              Then she says his name
              Speaks it into the ether
              In ways he’s never heard it spoken
              Radiating out into the universe
              Before she herself goes out
              Radiating who knows where
              Although before getting far
              She taps on the glass
              Peering in through the window
              And again mouths his name.

              ©brucetaub – 02/08 

              POETRY

                Cheerio Box Speaks of Love

                Cheerio box speaks of love and nutrition
                and makes the days I share with her happy,
                as well as providing a reduced risk of heart failure.
                She uses all three parts of her whole grains,
                a serving of nutrients,
                the strength of iron,
                all allotted in half cup servings.
                She is enlarged, whole, overflowing.
                contributing her non genetically modified ingredients
                into the very depths of my being;
                – though trace amounts of engineered materials
                may be slightly present –
                all a result of unavoidable cross contact
                with others, with sugars, 
                with omnipotent grains of corn.

                See how she makes my mornings
                with a positive start that brings forth my happiness,
                that invites me to consume her,
                and to love her back.
                Mi amor Integral.
                Sharing positive enhancements
                my Cheerio box explicitly tells me 
                that her freshness may be preserved
                and that the essence of her character
                ought be measured not by volume 
                but by weight,
                the truest measure of her contents.
                Enlarged to show her soluble fiber in detail
                any one patented serving
                contributes to my limited recommended daily diet.
                Best if used before her expiration date.
                She welcomes my questions and comments.

                POETRY

                  The Love Letter of a Delerious Man

                  I want you to know you exist as my animal mate and how truly savage that love is.  
                  I want you to watch a video of the mating ritual of eagles and then dive out of the tallest tree with me.
                  I want to roll in tree sap that never comes off and causes us to stick to one another 
                  inseparably, the incipient amber fusing our skins and our bodies into one big gem.  
                  I want to find you wet and make you wetter, to chew you and be chewed by you. 
                  I want us to struggle as if we were taffy, to be molded, stretched, broken, rejoined.  
                  I want to wring you out.  
                  I want to suck the water that is in the towel you dry yourself with to sustain me in the desert.  
                  I want you to know how much I adore you, and I want you to enjoy being so adored, from your brain to your toes.
                  I want to make children with you, even if we chose not to, I want to honor that I want to.  
                  I want to sit inside your mind and be visited by me there. 
                  To lift you on my shoulders and twirl you around like a little girl laughing and fall down together with you, the world spinning in a jumble.  
                  To protect you from everything, even me.  
                  To shed my ambivalence, then my skin, then my flesh; then be the bones you build your house with.  
                  To lay down with you, and rise up with you, and fly off with you, and sink to the bottom with you.
                  I want to change the world with you.
                  I want you to scream, “Enough, I cannot take any more, it is too intense.”  And I want you to mean it.  
                  I want to be somewhere where no one knows us, or knows we are there; then I want to ask you to leave me, then I want to fall down on my knees and beg you not to.  
                  I want to bury my head inside your flesh and cry.
                  To separate your labia and lick them, first inside on the right, then the left, and then slowly and deeply down the middle, your fingernails, pressed hard into the flat of my back, moaning in sensual agony.  
                  I want you to say whatever is inspired in you to say and know it is received by me as a symphony.  
                  I want you to put my face in between your hands and squeeze me until I am your face, and then I want to squeeze you hard enough to get myself back.  
                  I want you to tremble, verily tremble, before the mighty power of what we share, barely understanding.  
                  Then I want you to see the fierce possessive eternity you are reflected in the teardrop you evoke.  
                  Then just say, I love you, to me in your native tongue.  
                  Then say my name. 
                  Then put your head down on the pillow, complete, safe, eager to sleep, eager to be cuddled with, eager to rise again.
                  Know that I give to you the best and only that I have.
                  Know that I give to you until I can no longer rise up beside you, no longer rise up inside you.  
                  May it warm you, and heal you, and bring you great joy.
                  And may we wear it well together.  

                  MISCELLANEOUS

                    Miscellaneous, different, other, etc.

                    Feel Mo – Michael Korson

                    Feel Mofor Mo Shooer on his 70th birthday – by Michael Korson, M.D.

                    Feel Mo
                    More of Mo, so much Mo, 
                    Hale-Bopp blazing over Yosemite mountains 
                    And that ballet of shooting stars over strawberrys. 
                    Mo words, a galaxy of words, 
                    Q’s and A’s,
                    Mo politics, Mo sports, 
                    Mo man on second one out and a single up to the middle. 
                    Mo jubilation,
                    Mo Super Bowls,
                    Mo sorrows and Mo tears,
                    Mo arms to comfort and hold. 
                    Mo belly full laughs, 
                    Mo broken rules,
                    Mo hopped fences, 
                    Mo ignoring signs, 
                    Mo towed vans at Candlestick Park.
                    Mo music, saxophone, Middle Eastern,
                    Mo Omar Sosa in MOMA, 
                    Mo plays and discussions and opinions and questions. 
                    (To be a Jew is to question. Mo told me.)


                    Mo tennis balls, lawn bowls, 
                    Regular bowels,
                    No Mo broken bones.
                    Mo families, everywhere, 
                    cousins, ex in-laws, friends’ families, friends’ friends, 
                    All one big family of Mo, 
                    Mo, Larry and Curly, 
                    Mo parties, Mo ecstasy, 
                    Mo hanging from monkey bars. 
                    Mo mentum … No you’re retired. Relax. 
                    Mo ney please. 
                    Mo dogs (Donovan added that.)
                    Mo hikes.
                    Mo lying on the grass. 
                    Mo clutter, Mo mo clutter! 
                    Mo of everything
                    Mo beautiful. 
                    Many Mo years, Mo.
                    Lots more Mo, Mo.

                    Poetry